Remembering Loved Ones At Christmas | Festive Thoughts #6

Now I get that Christmas is meant to be ‘the most wonderful time of the year’ and I don’t want to take that away from anyone. But I do, and have been trying throughout this little series, want to highlight that it’s not like that for everyone.

A big thing about Christmas and this time of year in general is family. It’s the time of year where spending time with our loved ones is an essential and, although I personally think that’s a lovely thing, I understand that it’s not for everyone.

In some cases, we lose loved ones around this time of year and that takes a toll on all the festivities. Even if we don’t lose them at this time, Christmas is always a reminder of the people who we no longer have around us because of the emphasis on family time.

My family has been very unfortunate and we have lost a lot of loved ones over the years. Christmas, although it remains a happy time for us and certainly one of my favourites, is always a reminder of those people we miss.

I know it’s not the most fun thing to be discussing so close to the big day, but I think it’s important to highlight that Christmas isn’t always perfect.

I do think, regardless of what’s going on around you and who you may or may not have, that we should use the loss of our loved ones to remind us of how vital family is. Use this time of year to celebrate those you do have around you and make the most of the time you have together.

Some other things you can do to remember loved ones this Christmas is:

• Add them to your decorations. We lost a great-aunt a few years back and she used to go all out at Christmas. We have now inherited some of her decorations (pictured) and putting them up among our own things allows us to reminisce and remember her in a wonderfully fond way.
• Talk about it. Of course it’s hard and no one wants to be seen as a downer during this time of year, but talking about things is so important. Have a chat with your loved ones about how you’re feeling; share stories and anecdotes about your loved ones and have a laugh at all of the brilliant things they did.
• Be understanding. Christmas can be a hard time of year for those who are missing people, and you never know what’s going on behind closed doors. Use this time to be there for your friends and family. Let them know that you are there to support them, to be a shoulder to cry on or to cheer them up if needed.

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I know there wasn’t too much to this post, and I could have went more into detail with it. But being so close to Christmas and all I didn’t want things to be too heavy. I simply wanted to highlight the struggles some of us have and remind you that you’re not alone in them.

I hope you have a wonderful and happy Christmas.

Speak soon,

Rachael.