If you managed to spend some time with me this past month, then you’ll know that I was taking part in a writing challenge called My, Myself And I. Here is my first post about the whole thing in case you have no idea what I’m talking about.
This was the first writing challenge I have ever participated in and its certainly the first thing of weight that I’ve done on this blog.
I said just before May started that I was struggling with this blog. I was feeling like I didn’t have anything to say and I was worrying about how much I was neglecting this website.
Well, I’m sure if you’ve been here during May that you’re sick of the sight of me!
This month has been very successful for me and something that I have actually really enjoyed. Writing everyday is surprisingly enlightening and it’s taught me so much.
I have a LOT to say
Before I embarked on this writing challenge I was worried that I didn’t have anything to say anymore. I think the fact that I have managed to write a post (almost) every single day for a whole month has proved to the internet and to myself that I really do have something to say!
Alright, a lot of it is me going around in circles and it’s not like I came to any profound conclusions during this month. But I know now that no matter what I have to write about, I can do it.
Blogging isn’t that serious
For a while I forgot how much fun writing just for the hell of it can be. I found myself getting caught up in being ‘professional’, trying to create a brand and making myself seem serious.
Having to write something every day has forced me to accept my imperfections.
I truly am a perfectionist – especially when it comes to my work. But having to write everyday has forced me to experiment with different styles and methods of blogging.
I’ve learnt the beauty of having a space online that is totally mine.
Blogging gives me to say exactly what I want to say, publish whenever I want and generally just be who I am. It’s been very liberating to remember that in May.
I LOVE to talk about myself
Pretty much all of the posts throughout this past month have been about myself, my journey and my feelings.
I guess it makes sense as this is my blog after all, but for a while there I was feeling kind of embarrassed. I was worried that anyone reading would think that I’m very selfish and don’t have any deeper opinions.
But like I said, this is my blog. This is the space for me to come and talk about my feelings or my experiences in order to try and get something out of them.
I read a quote somewhere that said something along the lines of ‘you can only write what you know’ and that is exactly what I am doing here. Alright I don’t have the most exciting life and I certainly haven’t experienced that much, but what I do have I’m using to the absolute fullest capacity.
Sometimes being vulnerable isn’t that noticeable
As every post this month has been about myself, I’ve been sharing a lot of personal things with anyone who stumbles across this website.
I was thinking about it the other day and I just don’t even consider an audience when I talk about my life on here – no offence to anyone reading, that is.
But I truly don’t really think anyone will read what I have to say and I get so surprised when I get feedback either online or in real life.
As I just said, I haven’t experienced a lot but a lot of what I have experienced has been documented on this blog. Once I start writing I forget everything else and just talk about what I’m being pushed to do so.
In doing so, I don’t realise how vulnerable, honest and raw I’m being during what seems like a standard blog post. Doing that every day in May has actually been a little draining, in hindsight, but it has actually been so liberating too.
The word vulnerable is one that just makes me want to shrivel up, but it actually applies to my work so much. I try to be as honest as I can about my feelings, my life and my general opinions when writing because I feel like that truly is the best way to be.
I don’t think I’ll ever stop opening up and being honest, because I enjoy it and I really want to see more of it. ‘Be the change you wish to see’ and all that, right?
I have had such a blast writing every day in May. If you want to catch up on anything you might have missed, you can check out the topic on my blog here.
Thanks to Carrie Hope Fletcher for coming up with this challenge!
If there’s anything you’d like to see from me in the future or any other challenges you think I’d enjoy, please get in touch.
Speak soon,
Rachael.
Rachaelic 